It all started today two years ago…
This blows my mind. I will be honest when I decided to order my first challenge pack it was a HUGE investment in every sense of the word.
Not only the initial cost of my challenge pack but then I realized I had to exchange just about everything in my kitchen cabinets for healthier options. I started small, I ate separate from my family for the entire first one or two rounds. My grocery budget spiked for awhile but it came back down slowly because once they were out of a usual item I would replenish with a healthier “clean” alternative so we all were eating the same stuff. My grocery budget is slightly higher still because sadly food that is not packed full of chemicals and preservatives just costs more and that is a sad truth of our times in my opinion, but that is a blog topic for another time!
Time to workout. 30 min everyday? Easy enough and I soon found those 30 min to be essential to the best ones of my day! Meal planning took more than an hour the first few weeks, soon it became 15 minutes or less to plan a week! Grocery shopping seriously took three times as long for so long, my kids dreaded it, but eventually I became a pro at reading labels and I can now zip in and out faster than ever because I don’t go down every isle.
I invested, for the first time ever, in true personal development of myself both inside and out. I had put in the money and the time the first few weeks but soon it became very clear. If I wanted to be successful, truly successful, in what I was working on, i.e. ME, then I had to go inside and discover ME.
I actually wish I had a tape recorder in my head. No not really, you don’t want to hear all that crazy, but I wonder if some of it others can relate to. For example, every time I was near Starbucks I had to literally convince myself to keep on walking and that I would be ok with out a white chocolate mocha. I would say “what’s more important? That yummy delicious wonderful drink or reaching your goals?”. Thankfully my goals were winning because the sad truth is I hadn’t walked by a Starbucks without getting my favorite sugary coffee in more years than I care to admit! It was my source of happy, or so I thought.
I spent at least two months literally reconditioning my brain to understand that that white mocha never brought me happiness. All it ever really did was add to my weight issues that added to my self esteem issues that added to my self disgust every day. I haven’t had a white chocolate mocha since. Two years and not a one! I never will. I still love my Starbucks on occasion but I order so differently now and I will continue to do so because I am aware that every choice I make impacts the me I want to be.
So in this same way I faced all the reason I had carried extra pounds and could never unload them. I am the ultimate emotional eater. I eat chocolate and sugar to find comfort and what I thought was happiness. If I was sad or frustrated, angry or confused, and especially if I felt out of control to the circumstances around me I “NEEDED” to feed those emotions something sugary.
In October that year I ended back in therapy to help try and uncover the why because I so didn’t want to go down that path anymore. Unfortunately I didn’t figure out exactly why I do this but I did face many deep rooted emotions that I was able to release and no longer needed to feed.
In all of these ways and more it was undoubtedly the BEST investment I have ever made. What I purchased to teach me how to eat healthy and workout effectively gave me the drive to truly live a better life from the inside out in every way imaginable.
Two years later I have had struggles. Moving to New York State brought out more than a few old bad habits but I was able to recognize them sooner than later. I started immediately back on personal development to find the root of my emotions and as I continue to get a grasp on them I am getting better handling everything else too.
Today I weigh 20 pounds less than I did two years ago. I have an extra 15 pounds I didn’t have a year ago but all in all this is winning! This is living my best life. This is me. This is my life and I am proud of the journey I am on!
And August 2017