So this just came up on my Facebook memories today. It is ever so fitting in the roller coaster of life.
Last year when I posted this it was because Pillip was yet again deploying and we were facing an extended separation. I couldn’t for the life of me understand why we were facing another one that honestly seemed very senseless. God of course works everything out, we survived, we flourished in moments and we despised others but we made it through to today when we are all together again.
As I read this I am trying to remind myself yet again that God can see us through everything that we face and He can see the things I can not. He knows the outcomes ahead and He wants the best for me and my family. I have so many questions without answers. I feel unsettled as I look into the not so distant future. My classes (for this stage of the game) are almost done but I do not know when I will be able to take my clinical exam because there is a long wait list. Phil’s scheduled time on island is up in 8 months but we do not know what comes next for him. Questions, thoughts, ideas, fears, and worries all combine into a mass of prayers I find myself repeating at least 50 times a day.
Financially we could really use the income provided by me working again as a LPN, facts are facts and I want to help decrease debt and provide for our future. Along with this is the fact that getting a job with in the military health system could allow me the opportunity to transfer into a position at Phil’s next duty station as well as it has the potential to allow for an easier transition from LPN to RN when the time comes.
Where are we going to live? Where does God want our little family to go next? Part of me wants to have another adventure and part of me wants to stay here on Oahu a little longer. So much good has happened on this island. Such positive change for all of us. God has placed amazing people in our lives and I am not ready to say goodbye, yet if this is not the place for us anymore then I want to be open to the next steps we must take.
I find myself looking back going God you have so beautifully directed us and I want the same moving forward but can you please do it exactly how I have it figured out in my head? The truth is though that I tend to mess things up and so truly I want God to pave our path. My head is a jumbled mess, it is all I can think about from moment to moment, so I continue to pray for His will until I am through this trial just as with all the others.
At the heart of this I am challenged with not allowing myself to become so overwhelmed that I am distracted from my goals in health and fitness. Often in life when something gets stuck in my head it is all I can think about to the point that I tend to put all else on hold. This is probably one of my least favorable traits!
I have worked rather well at not allowing myself to do this over the past several days. I am trying to stay balanced in the things that matter to me personally that I can and do control. I control what I fuel my body with and how I show it love through excercise. I realised this weekend that so much of what I do for my healthy eating is habit now and it keeps me more on track than off by always having healthy options in my home ready to enjoy. Whatever day I shop for my fruits and vegetables I ensure I will have time to come straight home and wash, cut, and store them for easy grab and go. This allows me to have nutritious snacks always ready when in the past I may have reached for junk food or the unhealthy alternative of fast food. When you get a snack attack and all there is available is strawberries, grapes, cucumbers, carrots and celery you tend to stay on track easily enough to be fueled for further success. The saying failing to plan is planning to fail is true for me!
This weeks lunch… Quinoa veggie salad with chicken. Yumminess!
Today I started at day one in a challenge group led by my amazing fit fam friends and I am committing myself to the next 21 days with the fix extreme workouts and NO cheat meals starting today. I am off to a great start.
Here are today’s starting photos… looking for awesome changes in the next 21 days.
I had an awesome workout in my favorite gym… MY LIVING ROOM!!
I hope you will all join me over the next 21 days as I outline my journey and the way I navigate daily life to find success in reaching my goals!